The Real Monday Motivation

Some days you wake up ready to take on the world.

Other days, you'd rather hide in a shell, convinced you can't handle another day.

Life has many challenges because we live in a broken world. It's no wonder there are so many Monday memes that depict the frustration of another week of the mundane. Life and work holds dissatisfaction because of the Fall (Gen. 3:17-19).

But unlike the memes that point to the the climax of the weekend, believers in Christ don't just live for the weekend. This life is not all there is. The challenges and frustrations have a purpose. History is moving somewhere, to the return of Christ (2 Pet. 3:8-10).

In the meantime, the desperation we feel can actually provide great benefit. It reminds us that we need a Savior:

"O Lord, be gracious to us; we wait for you.
Be our arm every morning,
our salvation in the time of trouble."
Isaiah 33:2

While we often try to live self-sufficiently, it always fails. God wants to be our strength. And He graciously uses challenges to point us to our need for Him. So no matter what you're facing, cry out to Him today for help. Let Him be your "arm"   your place of protection and safety.

Instead of viewing this Monday as another hopeless round of the same old mundane or a repeat of painful experiences, look up. You've been given a new day, with fresh grace and new mercies (Lam. 3:22-23). You have a powerful Savior who brings strength to your battle against sin and hope in the troubles of today (Heb. 4:15-16).

This is where you find motivation. 

God is your strength. Find motivation and hope in the truth that you are not alone. You don't face suffering or fight sin on your own. God is redeeming the hard and hopeless you face. The difficulties will make heaven even sweeter.

Look up and look ahead. Today is temporary. Be faithful where you're at and look to Christ for strength and motivation for another week.

Confidence When Life is Bleak

Do you ever question whether you can survive another day of pain or heartache, feeling like everything around you is bleak?

It's ok to wrestle with discouragement from the brokenness of life. We all have days where we feel we have no confidence or hope left. But as we face hardship, we have cling to truth in the desperate moments. Hebrews 10:35 encourages us:

"Therefore do not throw away your confidence, which has a great reward." 

That phrase strikes me every time. There is reward in persevering and not giving up. The only problem is, while I want to remain confident and hopeful in any form of suffering, the reality is—I’m not. I battle doubt, fear, envy, discouragement, hopelessness, and a host of other things.

But what I love about Hebrews 10 is that it’s not simply a command to do better. It’s not a “Suck it and up and deal with your pain” exhortation. Nor is it a denial of the difficulty. No, there’s something bigger than us that solidifies our hope:

The blood of Jesus gives us complete access to the Father.

Stop and think about that. We have tremendous confidence in suffering because Jesus made a way for us to enter the holy place. (Heb. 10:19)

In the Old Testament, only the high priest could enter the holy place, and just once a year. It required the sacrifice of an animal, representing the blood shed for the sins of the people of God. Jesus fulfilled the sacrificial system by becoming the once-for-all, perfect sacrifice. And in doing so, He destroyed the curtain that separated us from God. This is the foundation of our confidence.

So when you fall into despair, when you sin, when you wrestle with the ongoing trials you face—you have a great High Priest to run to. One who knows and sympathizes with your weaknesses (Heb. 4:15). Don’t turn away from Him because you’re struggling or things are difficult. Run to the throne of grace (Heb. 4:16).

On the days you feel like God has abandoned you or is against you, look to the cross. Jesus shed His own blood to redeem you. To give you complete access to the Father who loves and cares for you. He could not abandon you now.

How does that provide confidence when life is bleak? Because today, we have the ability to draw near to a holy God. We can cry out for grace in our struggles and our failures. Our hope for hanging on is not based on ourselves. And that is a powerful, freeing reality. So then...

"...let us draw near with a true heart in full assurance of faith, with our hearts sprinkled clean from an evil conscience and our bodies washed with pure water. Let us hold fast the confession of our hope without wavering, for he who promised is faithful." Heb. 10:22-23

Let's turn to God in our weakness and experience His nearness, care, and faithful provision for today.

Detours: An Unexpected Grace

Some days, I get things checked off my to-do list and am proud of my accomplishments. Other days, I have grand plans, and my symptoms nail me, forcing me to stop and rest.

Early on in chronic illness, I lived in almost constant frustration with the de-railing of my plans and would become incredibly overwhelmed at my inability to accomplish my goals. However, over the last few years God has continued to teach me to rest and accept the detours as a form of grace.

While setting and accomplishing goals are very good things, it’s so easy for me to attach my worth to what I do. I become obsessed with my accomplishments, my success, my dreams, my goals, my ministry.

So God, in His grace, gently reminds me that focusing on myself or what I do never provides purpose and hope. It doesn't last. He redirects the day, stripping away temporary things and offering something eternal (2 Cor. 4:17-18).

Instead of believing the lie that God is somehow against me or keeping what’s best from me, I must speak the truth to my heart that God is good and all He does is good (Ps. 119:68). That He who sacrificed His own Son for my sake would not deny me anything good (Rom. 8:28). That what I see as a wasted detour is actually God's pruning method so I might be more fruitful (Jn. 15:1-2).

If I can bring the gospel to mind in my detours, I can recognize:

Even the delaying of my goals or the frustration of my plans is an act of God’s grace.

Yes, including the timing on this very blog post. My own writing agenda and goals were delayed time and time again. I've attempted to finish a blog post for an entire week (talk about waste of time!), with my own share of detours, chronic illness flares, wrestlings over writing, and inability to communicate my thoughts.

While it's been frustrating to feel so stuck, God is using this to remind me to let Him do His work today in the delays. To not fight it. To accept today's detours as an unexpected, but good, grace of God. He only does what is best for me. And for you. 

May we learn to rest in His goodness and care.

"For the Lord God is a sun and shield; the Lord bestows favor and honor. 

No good thing does He withhold from those who walk uprightly." 

Psalm 84:11

Finding Life in the Death of Self

Whether it's laying down a dream, your future, or a deep longing, much of the Christian life involves death. It’s painful. Idols are powerful. Desires are strong. We grasp for control, success, recognition, power, or acceptance—desperately trying to prove ourselves.

But Jesus explains that dying to self is part of our life in Him:

“If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me.” Luke 9:23

Dying to self looks different for each person in particular seasons.

• For the chronic illness sufferer, it may mean giving up future plans and learning to rest with your limitations and spend extensive time doing routine tasks.
• For the young mom, it means changing lots of diapers, endless laundry, and having conversations with a two year old all day.
• For the student with an annoying roommate, it means learning to overlook small things and love them more than yourself. 
• For the elderly person, it could mean investing in kids around you when you'd rather enjoy the free-time and quiet.
• For business person, it could mean sacrificing a promotion because it involves dishonest business ethics.
• For the pastor, it may mean losing your reputation because you did what was right.
• For the missionary, it could look like sharing the gospel for a decade and seeing no tangible fruit.
• For the parent with a prodigal, it may mean giving up your desire to fix their foolish choices and simply pray fervently for them.
• For the person with a broken relationship, it may mean forgiving someone who's hurt you deeply.

While each circumstance involves unique struggles, they all require dying to self. Are you frustrated with the "dying to self" process?  Think of it this way:

"An easygoing, non self-denying life will never be one of power." Hudson Taylor

Do you want your life to radiate the joy and hope of Christ? It doesn't happen when things are easy. God, in His grace, chooses to work through the disappoint, hurt, loss, and self-denial. Because in that process we learn to lay down our hopes, dreams, and even fears.

And the result? We find that Jesus is better.

“Indeed, I count everything as loss because of the surpassing worth of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord. For His sake I have suffered the loss of all things and count them as rubbish, in order that I may gain Christ.” Philippians 3:8

This is the beauty in dying to self. Taking up my cross results in great, eternal gain (Phil. 1:21). When we strive to build our own little kingdoms, to fight for what we want, it produces defeat and death. But when we die to self, we find life (Mk 8:35).

Just as a seed has to die in order to grow into a strong, flourishing tree, so we have to die to ourselves for God to produce beautiful fruit.

As much as I want my world to revolve around me, it leaves me empty. Only when I die to myself can I find life and joy. The joy that Jesus really is the greatest treasure. The ultimate satisfaction.

May you find life today in the death of yourself.

“I have been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me. And the life I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me.” Galatians 2:20

To the One Sick of Enduring...

Dear weary one,

I don't know exactly what you're walking through, but I sympathize with your agony and desperation. Life is unbearably hard sometimes. There are days it doesn't seem worth it to face the ongoing pain of suffering, health problems, relationships, ministry, or life.

It’s normal to be weary and want the suffering to end. The Psalmist himself wrestled:

“I am weary with my moaning; every night I flood my bed with tears; 
I drench my couch with my weeping.” Psalm 6:6

Some days I’m weary with the cost too. The cost of following Christ. The cost of cross-bearing.

It’s ok to struggle. To be tired of enduring. But don’t give up. Look up.

"When I am weary with the cost
I see the triumph of the cross
So in its shadow I shall run
Til you complete the work begun"
When Trials Come

Looking to Jesus and His finished work on the cross propels us to endure when all around seems hopeless (Heb. 12:3). He gives us hope to continue to do what's right when we can't see results (Gal. 6:9). God also uses those desperate circumstances to teach us to rely on Him (2 Cor. 1:8-9). If we endure, we will reign with Him (2 Tim. 2:12).

And you know what else? Jesus promises rest in the midst of your heavy burdens and weariness:

"Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light." Matthew 11:28-30

The gospel brings freedom from sin, purpose to our pain, and glorious future hope. May the triumph of the cross, the truth that Jesus faced the worst suffering on your behalf to save you from eternal suffering, give hope to you in your weariness today.

God provides fresh grace to endure the challenges of each day. He holds you fast when all you want to do is give up. Don't lose heart: He is redeeming and restoring. There is purpose in the heartache and brokenness. If you find yourself sick of enduring today, look to Jesus to find rest and hope.

- A fellow traveler seeking to endure

Complexity of Life

If there’s one thing I’ve learned the last few years, it’s that life is far more complicated than I ever imagined.

The brokenness of this world, the physical breaking down of our bodies, the curse of sin, the idolatry of our own hearts, the many emotions that God has created us with—all contribute to the complex human beings that we are.

And put two people together, combined with different life experiences, challenges, expectations and sin patterns, and you have a recipe for disaster. This is why marriages, families, churches, and ministries are so often a mess.

Because life is so complex, counseling another believer is also greater than merely presenting biblical truth. I firmly believe that the Bible has answers and applies to all of life. But situations are not as black-and-white as I once perceived, and that makes discipling, counseling, or mentoring far different from, “Here’s the truth; just apply it.”

As Job's friends were terrible comforters, we can do the same when we tell someone in deep suffering trite phrases like, "God is working this out for your good!" While this is a true statement, it is not what someone needs to hear in that moment:

“Whoever sings songs to a heavy heart is like one who takes off a garment on a cold day, and like vinegar on soda.” Proverbs 25:20

As Proverbs informs, our words, though perhaps well-intentioned, can hurt much more than we realize. I've recognized this as people have responded to my chronic health issues. I think sometimes, in our quick-fix culture, we want to solve the problem for someone. Yet biblical help requires time to patiently listen and wisdom to understand and discern what is really going on.

I am the first to admit that I have been way too quick to fix people’s problems. The more I experience chronic illness and suffering's effects, and the more I write about it, the more I realize I don’t know. People are complex. Life is hard. Sin is strong.

But Jesus is greater.

You see, to face the complexity of life with hope, we need more than truth to obey or something to distract from the pain. We need someone in whom we can rest our hope. We need Jesus. And we need to point others to Jesus, and not simply to what they need to do.

Let's be careful to not oversimplify life and counsel and forget that we are working with complex, hurting human beings. Point the person you’re helping to a loving Father who offers comfort, forgiveness, healing, and hope. To the God who walks with them.

Let's help people find Jesus: a powerful Savior, perfect Comforter, and great Sustainer through the pain and complexity of life.


*Additional note: Dave Furman has a book titled "Being There: How to Love Those Who Are Hurting" that is one of the best books I've read on helping others. In it he shares 10 practical things to NOT do with someone who is suffering. I highly encourage everyone to read it!

Facing Your Frailty

Do you feel frail today? Are your limitations, weaknesses, and sins at the forefront of your mind?

God knows our frailty and does not despise it:

"As a father shows compassion to his children,
so the Lord shows compassion to those who fear him.
For He knows our frame; He remembers that we are dust.”
Psalm 103:13-14

The all-powerful God is a compassionate and gentle Father. He knows we are weak. He doesn't expect perfection, He asks for our humble dependence.

Dependence is only possible through the redeeming work of the gospel in our hearts. The gospel levels all of us to the same need: the need for a Savior.

You can face your frailty with hope today because nothing you do changes your standing as a child of God. Not your success, performance, achievements, or anything else. It's the imparting of Christ's righteousness, not your own, that makes you blameless. The gospel provides the only way to face our human frailty without feeling like a failure.

Thus the gospel brings hope to the worst sin, the darkest struggles, and the hardest pain. This means...

• When you respond sinfully again, you can turn to Him and find forgiveness (1 Jn 1:9).
• When you become fearful and anxious, you can find comfort in the Savior who will never leave you (Heb. 13:5).
• When you are stuck on your bed in pain, you can find hope in the truth that God isn't wasting anything (1 Pet. 1:6-7).
• When all around you is falling apart, you can run to the Rock and find shelter (Ps. 18:2).

God sympathizes and cares for you in your weakness and frailty. He doesn't ask you to be strong. He wants you to experience His strength in your weakness:

“My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong."
2 Corinthians 12:9-10

If you battle chronic illness, your frailty may be more evident than the average person. But it's not a bad thing to feel frail. It means you are human, and you need Jesus and gospel hope to face your frailty.

And that is true for all of us.

Adventures Traveling with Chronic Illness

In my previous post I shared 10 things I learned about traveling with chronic illness from a recent vacation. Now, just for fun, here are a few pictures from my trip!

Downtown San Francisco! I love the historic trolleys.

Mussel Rock Park

Pacifica, CA

Redwoods!

Traveling with Chronic Illness

A couple weeks ago I had an incredible opportunity to travel back to my birth and childhood state! While I didn't travel in the specific area I grew up, it was still super nostalgic to be back in California.

This was my first time to travel and have a real vacation since chronic illness slammed me 3.5 years ago. It also marked almost exactly one year of Lyme disease treatment. So it was a huge accomplishment for me! Yet because of chronic illness, traveling is different for me now. And it taught and reminded me of a number of things.

None of my findings are rocket science, just some reminders from a fellow chronic illness sufferer.

Ten things I learned from traveling with chronic illness:

1. Research! I did a ton of research before my trip, learning the public transportation options, travel routes, locations of different things I wanted to do, etc. I discussed possibilities with my traveling buddy and decided what the best options were, and created a potential travel agenda.

2. Don't travel alone. A friend traveled with me who knew and understood my limitations, which was huge. You need someone who will be of help to you, instead of pressuring you to do more than you can handle. Even if the person doesn't completely understand, talk about it a lot beforehand so it's not a pressure point during the trip.

3. Hold plans loosely. Being flexible and creating realistic expectations is one of the biggest challenges but perhaps most important. Creating an itinerary is important, but you may flare and need a nap when you'd rather be out and about. You may have to drop a long, busy day for something simple and close by. Weather may alter your plans. Holding plans loosely and being able to adjust helps keep your body from overreacting (and crashing) even more from the stress.

4. Expect things to take longer than expected. This point sounds redundant, but how often are we idealistic in how much we can push and how quickly we can do something? I forgot to factor in needing extra sleep from traveling, adjusting to a different time-zone, morning fatigue, and navigating a new place. I had to scratch a number of different things on my agenda I really wanted to see and do. So just plan lots of extra time, and don't worry if you can only do half of what you wanted. It's better than nothing!

5. Pack as lightly as possible. Prioritize health-related packing over style accessories. Make sure you have enough layers to deal with circulation issues or quickly changing weather. If you're flying, it's worth checking a bag so you don't have to drag as much weight around the airport, causing extra fatigue and pain.

6. Keep routines as much as possible. Don't just eat junk food because you're traveling or throw out your entire diet. Don't neglect supplements and medications. Find times to stretch, practice deep breathing, or take a nap. Those routines hugely impact your body's ability to remain stable as you face the stress of traveling. Don't stress if there are certain routines impossible to keep up with, but do what you can with your options.

7. Be prepared. On the opposite end of packing lightly, it's also important to consider the extra things you may need like supplements and medications. I brought more supplements and medications than makeup! Consider what food options you'll need, and perhaps pack those, especially if you're driving. I packed a number of Lara bars for quick protein options and ate green smoothies for breakfast to keep things easy and healthy. Additionally, think through travel necessities, such as water, gum, and medication for ear/head pressure if you fly, or a neck pillow if that helps you.

8. Drink water! Hydrating is critical when you're traveling. Pack a small, light water bottle that's easy to refill and force yourself to drink!

9. Pace yourself. Plan low-key activities and find ways to take breaks. Is your endurance limited? Does fatigue or pain slam you out of the blue? Make sure you don't push yourself to crashing point by planning low-key activities. Maybe you can drive around somewhere instead of walking. Perhaps a museum will cause sensory overload, but a park visit will not. Pacing helps the enjoyment of the trip.

10. Know your limits. Think through your particular limitations and issues and what you will handle best. Try to avoid the particular things that are challenging for you. My sensory overload is impacted most by a lot of noise/lights inside buildings, so I planned more outdoor things. Carrying my camera for periods of time increases my pain and inflammation, so my friend graciously carried it most of the time.


Traveling itself is stressful on the body of a chronically ill person. So finding ways to combat the stress and make it easier is crucial.

Happy travels!

Side note: There were many things that made my trip possible, including a generous friend who let me stay in her house and borrow her car. So thankful for God's grace in this opportunity and for health that was stable enough (finally!!) to endure it.

Facing a New Year with Hope

Does your life feel hopeless right now? Dreading this new year because of what it potentially holds? Is your life on a trajectory you never would’ve wanted?

I don’t know what you’ve walked through, but I know this:

Suffering impacts us deeply.

The last several years I’ve faced a lot of different types of pain. I’ve experienced the deepest heartache, betrayal, and disappointments I’ve known. It's impossible to summarize all the things that have happened. But as for long-term impact, chronic illness has been the most life-shattering.

Many chronic illness sufferers find themselves stuck because life is no longer as it used to be. A job may be impossible because of severe symptoms. Perhaps marriage is no longer an option, or to have children. Unable to work, I had to return to live with my parents in my mid-20s, while my dad covered all my health and living expenses (not cheap!!). It was very discouraging for me as I wanted to be able to at least contribute to my own burden.

No matter your specific situation, if this new year feels more hopeless than hopeful, I want to encourage you through four ways...

Fear Meets Truth
One of ways to face the new year with hope is to combat fear with truth. Actively bring to mind the things you know to be true. Things like:

• God walks through the deepest waters with you (Is. 43:2).
• God is your refuge and strength (Ps. 46:1-3).
• Jesus emptied Himself that you might find lasting freedom and life (Phil. 2:6-8).
• God cares so much that He keeps count of your tears (Ps. 56:8).
• This is temporary (2 Cor. 4:17).

Despair Meets Comfort
No matter what you face today—you can experience comfort. Comfort in the presence of Jesus walking with you. Comfort knowing that this is will end. Comfort that God is in the process of redeeming the messiest situation. Comfort that it all has purpose. Turn and find comfort in the God who cares for you.

Longing Meets Fulfillment
Longing is part of living in a broken world. Loneliness, brokenness, and disappointment is normal, even for believers, and it may make this new year feel incredibly discouraging. But one day, all our longings will be completely fulfilled in Christ. For now, let the desperate longings help you to long for something better, something greater:

"...He has caused us to be born again to a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, to an inheritance that is imperishable, undefiled, and unfading, kept in heaven for you." 1 Pet. 1:3-4

Brokenness Meets Hope
Sometimes our disappointment comes from the brokenness within and around us. Lost job, shattered relationship, bankruptcy, abuse, betrayal, the death of a dream....the list goes on. The brokenness of the world hits hard, and there are very real difficulties to grieve over and wrestle with. Yet in the midst, we have to cling to where real hope is found:

“True lasting hope is never found horizontally. It’s only ever found vertically, at the feet of the Messiah, the One who is hope. Place your hopeful heart in his hands today.” Paul Tripp

No matter where 2018 left you, or what fears and hopes you timidly hold for 2019, remember that comfort can be found on the most uncertain of days. We have a Savior who entered our brokenness, took on our despair and longing, and made a way to destroy our fears and suffering forever.

Only in Christ can you face 2019 with hope.

When No One Understands

The car waved me on in front of them. I reluctantly stepped into the road, even though I wanted to wait for them to pass. I hated people watching me walk. I moved like a grandma with a cane instead of the quick young person I used to be. I could barely put one foot in front of the other. My legs felt like lead trying to lift them.

While I trudged across, the car honked at me for walking so slowly. I almost burst into tears, but managed to hold it together long enough to pick up my few items from the store before I completely crashed from the sensory overload and fatigue. I broke down crying when I got back to my car.

As embarrassing and discouraging as it was, having a stranger frustrated with me was nothing compared to times friends or family wondered if I was really as sick as I claimed. Was I just being dramatic? It is so difficult to explain chronic illness, and even harder for the people you know to understand.

Does it seem like you're alone too?
Do you ever feel as though no one understands what you’re going through?
Is your suffering so difficult that those around you can't seem to sympathize or help?

You’re not alone this Christmas.

While the Christmas story seems full of hope and joy and nostalgia, there were some very hard circumstances surrounding that historical account. Giving birth to the Son of God was not all joy and ease.

Think about Mary, the mother of Jesus. She was told she would carry the Messiah. This is the greatest and most humbling privilege in the world! And yet she was met with opposition and judgment. People thought she had been immoral. Her reputation was forever ruined. It was ugly, and she probably got a lot of side-glances as she walked down the road.

Sadly, she couldn't even explain to them, because they wouldn't believe her. There was nothing she could do to make them understand.

Jesus received the same response. The Savior of the world was not met with the honor and praise He deserved. He was mocked by the people He came to save (Mt. 13:55). He was despised and rejected by men (Is. 53:3). His own people wouldn’t receive Him (Jn. 1:11).

However, it’s because Jesus endured mistreatment that He can sympathize with us (Heb. 4:15). It's because He was separated from the Father and experienced the worst type of aloneness that we are never left alone.

So if you feel hopeless this Christmas because no one can understand what you're going through, remember that you're not alone.

Jesus walked the worst road of loneliness, rejection, and misunderstanding so that we can find everlasting hope and comfort. He offers acceptance and understanding no mere person can provide. May the hope of the gospel, that God has made a way for forgiveness and acceptance through His Son, bring hope to you this season, even when no one else understands.

Surviving the Holidays with Chronic Illness

Christmas is approaching and any busy holiday, party, or event usually becomes a huge stressor for those with chronic illness. Here are some ways to survive the holidays with chronic illness!

1. Accept your limitations. It's ok to admit you can't do as much as the average person this season. It's better if you can accept the limitations instead of fighting them or trying to prove that you can do it all.

2. Take breaks. Look for opportunities to rest. Resting may help you make it through a busy day better than pushing til you crash hard. Even if taking a nap isn't an option, backing away from the middle of the crowd into a corner that's a little quieter may help. Be creative!

3. Look for ways to focus on others. As you spend time with family and friends, ask someone else to tell you how they’re doing and what’s going on in their life. Let them talk for a while and focus on them. Or find a child to play with or an elderly family member to sit by. Focusing on others helps from being consumed with your symptoms.

4. Don’t commit. As much as possible, don’t commit! Not to parties or events or outings. Learn to say no to as much as you can, and then participate in the things as you are able or feeling up to it. This takes off a layer of stress that amplifies symptoms.

5. Don't stress over questions. You know you'll get questions from well-meaning family and friends about how you're doing, how treatment is going, or perhaps get some unwanted health advice. Learn to take those with grace and not worry about answering perfectly when people ask! It's ok to be general, but honest.

6. Don't lose hope. It is super discouraging to have your pain and limitations stare you in the face as everyone else enjoys the busyness and fun. You may be unable to do the things you desperately want to do! Take heart: remember that your illness is temporary. God is with you and He understands your pain and limitations (Heb. 4:15). Cry out to Him and ask Him to renew your hope.

Bonus! For those who have a friend or family member with chronic illness, here are a few ways to help:

• Allow them to rest. Don’t pressure them to be involved in every game or activity or help with preparations or cleanup. They're not being lazy, sometimes they need quiet or a break. Sensory overload, pain, and fatigue exhaust a person. Be grateful that they made it.
• Don't overload them with questions. Be gentle and kind in your questions. Take interest, but don’t overload them with questions about how their healing process is going; it may be very discouraging to them! 
• Don’t say, “You look like you’re feeling better!” This is one of the most unhelpful things you can tell someone with invisible illness, as usually how they look on the outside is not a very good indicator of how they actually feel. Chronic illness sufferers also become very adept at "faking" looking well, as it is the only way they can keep going.
• Consider what they can eat. Many people with chronic illness have limited diets, and the holidays can be stressful simply because you have to think about what will be available for you on top of the chaos of the day. Ask them what they can eat and provide a few options for them. They will be eternally grateful!

When the Holidays Are Hard

The holiday season is supposed to be "merry and bright," full of excitement and wonder...
but do you feel the exact opposite?

Does it seem like you have nothing to be thankful for or excited about this year? Nothing to look forward to? That everything’s been taken away and God is more against you than for you?

Many people experience deep sadness, depression, resurfacing bad memories, or even night terrors around the holidays. While there is a lot of hype and excitement about this season, it can discourage those who are hurting even more, as it’s another reminder of what has been lost.

If you’ve lost your health due to chronic illness, are facing relational conflict, grieving a loss, or despairing about Christmas because of the difficulty of life, let me encourage you with a few reminders:

1. It’s ok if the holidays are hard. Holidays can be a very difficult time for so many reasons. It's part of life in a broken, sin-cursed world. Instead of feeling guilty and despairing that it’s so hard, continually ask God to give you grace for each day. He will provide.

2. It’s good to cry out in the pain. It's natural to hate the pain you're facing, whether that's physical or emotional. It's normal to struggle. And it's good to grieve the pain and the losses. As you cry out in the pain, let it push you to God and not away from Him. He is a great Comforter.

3. Excitement and joy are not the end goal. If you are struggling to make it though the holidays, you don't have to hype yourself up or force joy. Yet even when it's really hard, it's helpful to focus on what you do have instead of what you've lost. This helps direct your heart and mind to what is true and give you a sense of gratitude in the difficulty. Ask God to help you see how you can honor Him through the pain. And talk to a friend or family member who can help you see past the fog.

4. Be thankful for the little things. Was your pain more endurable today? Did someone unexpectedly send you a text or a gift? Did a doctor's appointment reveal something you were unaware of? Did you have a warm drink today or a delicious meal? Did you see a clear evidence of God's grace and kindness towards you? Instead of being consumed by the losses, thank God for those small blessings.

5. Remember the greatest truth—Immanuel is “God with us”. The beauty of the Christmas season is not in the memories, the traditions, the people, or the gifts (although those are good things). The most comforting truth is that God came to dwell with us, sinful men and women, to bring hope and redemption. Jesus entered our brokenness to bring us freedom from sin. He, Immanuel, has not left you alone, but walks with you today.

As you struggle through the pain associated with the winter holidays, may you also find comfort in the God and Father who dwells with us, amidst the pain and the messiness. May that truth bring hope and comfort to our weary hearts.